Oh the Joys of a LARGE hospital

Andrew is still having a difficult time eating.  The zantac that we got a prescription for made him sick so I stopped that after about 6 days.  Over the past 3 weeks, his daily average has dropped to 17.7oz, a loss of 5.6oz a day.  The low point of his goal is 25 oz/day so he's a ways off!

I called last week and left a message for the pediatrician.  Gave the nurse my facts and I told her I wanted him seen or a new medicine prescribed or something!!  Didn't hear anything last week.  (I think the doc was on vacation)  I called back today and within 30 minutes had the response of "the doc doesn't wanted to prescribe anything else but would like to refer you to a pediatric gastroenterologist."  Ok fine, they transferred me to the appointment desk and they can't get Andrew in until the beginning of the year!!!!!  WHAT?!  They can't put us on a waiting list either because of the large number of patients waiting.  So their advice was to call in everyday to see if there are any cancellations.  So what am I supposed to do in the mean time as my child's throat is becoming more and more raw everyday?!  I'm so frustrated!  I did get a weight check scheduled for Wednesday so we'll see how that goes.

On another note, I got an email this morning that made me chuckle.  It was from whattoexpect.com titled "Getting a Handle on Worrying".  It said, "Feeling consumed with thoughts that your baby isn't sleeping enough, or sleeping too much, or not getting enough to eat, crying too much or not doing what your best friend's sister's baby did at the same age? Is there anything you're not worried about these days?"  I wish these were my only worries.  I have a lot of worry.  Everytime I schedule an appointment, I worry.  I have small anxiety attacks when appointments get close.  (it was so scary the first few times my chest got tight and I couldn't breathe!)  Every cough, every choke, everytime I put him in his bed at night worries me.  Andrew is doing so good but there are too many what ifs.  I've read about too many innocent children that were fine one day and on life support the next.  I worry everyday about everything.  I worry even more about my relationship with Eric.  I worry about finances.  I worry about my relationship with my husband. 

Why can't life just be easy?